Thursday, December 15, 2011

What did I just do? Revisited edition.

Yesterday I did a quick post from the Target parking lot. You might have seen the horrible UPC barcode card I pulled from the Topps American Pie blaster I bought. All I could think about on the way home was how I should have purchased a discounted blaster of Obak for $11.99.

Don't get me wrong. Not every single card in the box was hideous. I'll pass on the Jim Henson and Muppet Show cards to my youngest son. I got a foil parallel of Jimi Hendrix that is pretty psychadelic. I actually thought this card was a nice one.

Vincent Price is cool AND creepy at the same time. I think the "lady" in the background may actually be the sister of Joe DeSa.

That's about all the nice I can muster up for this product. How about we look at a trio of awfulness. A little "Cardboard Depreciation" if you will.

Do we really need a card highlighting the FDA approving the use of birth control pills? I think not, yet here it is in all it's black and white glory.

This is the epitome of ridiculousness. I don't even think Beardy would approve of this card.

Wow. Just wow. That is awful. Did Bill Gates actually give his permission for Topps to use that photo?

Hey, I got a Big Pussy relic! Never, not in a million years, did I think I'd ever type that sentence. Topps didn't see fit to put Vincent Pastore's Sopranos nickname on the back of this relic card. I considered using it in the title of my post, but I just couldn't do it. I know I could have gotten a few thousand extra hits if I had used it. The card looks creased in the pic, but it's not.

I did get a somewhat tough pull in the blaster. The spotlight parallels are 1:47 packs and I got a Gary Cooper #14/76. Unfortunately, I forgot to scan (photograph) it.

I won't be buying any more of these cards. It's just not my cup of tea, but if you like it, more power to you. Especially if you're the Daily Dimwit and your wife likes these cards. Anything that gets a wife interested in cards can't be all bad.


  1. Those are some sorry-ass muttonchops! If they are going to highlight those, they'd of done better to show off with these:


  2. Very cool Gary Cooper. He is my favorite actor of all time. Not to mention, he played Lou Gehrig in "Pride of the Yankees"!

  3. Kyle, if you think Cooper playing Gehrig is cool, check out the 1938 film Rawhide, the role of Lou Gehrig was played by... Lou Gehrig!

  4. vincent price - never heard of him.

    birth control - awesome invention.

    muttonchops - i'm japanese... could never pull this off.

    bill gates - steve jobs is cooler.

    vincent pastore - love me some big pussy!

    love these posts where i get to write down the first words that come to mind when looking at pieces of cardboard!

  5. I've got it! You should hold a bracket of the worst cards ever. The UPC and the Pill would definitely make the round of 64 (no play-in games - they're poop).

  6. Jim Henson and Muppets cards? I'll have to dig through the common boxes for some of those for the collection. Hopefully there aren't any Muppet relic cards. Those would scar a little one for life.